Domestic Violence and Protective Orders in Military Families
Unfortunately, domestic violence is common in military marriages. If you are abused by your spouse, who is in the military, you may be aware of how frightening, intense, and confusing these encounters can be. You may deeply love and care about your spouse but must make arrangements to protect yourself and your children as soon as possible.
These situations are never easy to face, and it can seem almost impossible to leave and get the help you need. However, you must prioritize your and your children’s safety and well-being before things worsen. If you need immediate legal advice, please call Grable Grimshaw, PLLC, after contacting law enforcement.
Defining domestic violence
According to the United States Department of Justice, domestic violence is “a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power and control over another intimate partner.” Domestic violence can come in many forms, including physical violence, sexual violence, psychological violence, financial violence, emotional violence, and more. Here are some examples of domestic violence in a marriage:
- Hitting
- Kicking
- Punching
- Biting
- Rape or sexual assault
- Name-calling
- Constant criticism
- Undermining
- Restricting access to money or bank accounts
- Threatening
- Intimidating
- Humiliating
- Manipulating
- Withholding needs and essentials
- Forcing isolation
- Gaslighting
- Guilt-tripping
Domestic violence can present in different ways. If you feel like you are a victim of domestic violence but are not completely sure, it is important that you report the incident to law enforcement and seek medical treatment right away if you are hurt. Do not ignore or hope that the pattern of behaviors will go away; the longer you wait to get help, the worse your situation may become.
How common is domestic violence in military marriages?
Domestic violence is very common in military marriages. On average, around 36 percent of women and 34 percent of men are victims of domestic violence at some point in their lives. However, for active service members and veterans, the percentage goes up to about 58 percent. U.S. Medicine explains that service members are three times more likely than non-service members to commit domestic violence against their spouses.
Will my spouse be arrested if I notify authorities about the domestic violence in San Antonio?
Texas requires authorities to check on the victim and investigate any reports of domestic violence. Therefore, if you notify law enforcement about the domestic violence incident, police officers will likely arrive at your house to look into the situation and make sure everything is okay. If they have probable cause that a domestic violence incident has happened, they will most likely make an arrest. However, you should not let this keep you from reporting the incident and seeking help. If you are being assaulted, hurt, stalked, or threatened, it is critical to let the authorities know so they can help you get somewhere safe and away from your spouse as quickly as possible.
What is an order of protection, and how do I obtain one?
An order of protection is a court order to keep your abusive spouse away from you. You can apply for this order, and if granted, your spouse can no longer threaten, hurt, harass, or assault you. Instead, they must stay away from where you live, where you work, or any other location that you may be at. They also cannot carry or own a gun or weapon.
To start the process, you may:
- Speak with and hire a lawyer
- Visit your local police station
- Go to your county or district attorney’s office
- Reach out to a domestic violence shelter
- Contact a legal aid office
If you receive an order of protection, the courts will send this document to your local police station to serve your spouse. Your spouse will then be allowed to attend a court hearing to dispute the order of protection and plead their case against you.
What is a military protective order?
A military protective order is “a short order that bans a service member from communicating or contacting an individual considered a protected person.” Cornell Law School states that military protective orders are commonly used “to facilitate a cooling off period following domestic violence and sexual assault incidents.” You do not have to be in the military to request or be granted a military protective order. However, most people pursue a civilian order of protection as military protective orders can only protect them on the military base where the military protective order was requested.
Is a civilian order of protection different from a military protective order?
A civilian order or protection and a military protective order are meant to protect victims of domestic violence by preventing the offender from committing any future domestic violence attacks against them. However, there are a few big differences between these two orders. We will go over five of the differences below.
- A military protective order protects the offender while on the military base, while a civilian order of protection protects the offender anywhere.
- You do not have to attend a hearing to obtain a military protective order, but you do have to attend one to obtain a civilian order of protection.
- Military protective orders are quick to obtain, but they do not last as long as a civilian order of protection.
- If you obtain a military protective order and move to a different base, you must get a new military protective order for that base. However, if you have a civilian order of protection that is still valid, you are protected anywhere you move.
- Civilian police officers cannot enforce a military protective order. Instead, they must report any violations to the military police.
How long will my order of protection or military protective order last?
Civilian orders of protection can last up to two years. If you need your civilian protective order extended past the two-year mark, you can request an extension or file for a new one. As mentioned, a military protective order is intended to only be short-term. However, there is no certain time length for these orders. They usually last at least ten days, but the unit command officer will decide how long they think this order is needed. Per 10 US Code § 1567, military protective orders “shall remain in effect until such time as the military commander terminates the order or issues a replacement order.”
What if my spouse does not follow the military or civilian protective order that is put in place?
If your spouse does not follow or abide by the military protective order, the military commander will decide their punishment, which may include:
- Court-martial proceedings
- Non-judicial punishment
- Other disciplinary actions
If your spouse does not follow or abide by a civilian protective order, they can be arrested, face charges, and be required to pay fines. If they continue to violate the order, they may receive a felony.
Is my child protected by my San Antonio protective order?
A protective order can also protect your children. Therefore, if you share children with your spouse and request a military or civilian protective order, you can ask that it extend to your children as well, which would prevent your spouse from having contact with them. However, remember that this arrangement will most likely only be temporary, as the judge or military commander will want to hear both sides of the story and determine what custody or visitation options are best for the children.
If you are in an abusive marriage and need legal help on how to protect yourself and divorce your spouse, the San Antonio divorce lawyers at Grable Grimshaw, PLLC, are here to help. We can help you take the necessary steps to protect your life and well-being. The military divorce process is never easy, but we are committed to handling the challenges while you concentrate on moving forward and creating a better future for you and your children. Please call our office or submit our contact form to schedule a consultation to speak with our attorneys in San Antonio today.